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[30 Nov 2008|05:08pm] |
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tegan and sarah-downtown |
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It has occurred to me recently that I check this almost every day, but I never post anything anymore. It has been more than a year since I have utilized lj for what it's really for, a place to rant and write useless things for people to either read or ignore. I remember a time, back before I had livejournal, when there was deadjournal and I wrote every day, no matter what I had to say. I forgot how cathartic it can be to have something to put your feelings into, even if no one responds to what you're saying. It's sad that I haven't written any of the good things that have been happening in my life, that I'm resorting to an online journal to pour my bad horrible thoughts into while I listen to emo crap on my computer. I never thought I'd be feeling this way again in my life, and never thought I'd be in this position, sitting at my computer, listening to sad music and crying while I type. I never thought I'd be depressed or sad again. I don't know how I thought that, but I did. My naivety has once again gotten the best of me. It's a horrible feeling to feel like you can't talk to people about things, like you have no one to tell the truth to. I hate these sinking feelings I get everyday. This feeling like the best thing in my life is slowly slipping through my fingers like sand, and I can't do anything to stop it, because every move I make causes the sand to slip faster from my grasp. I wish I could go back in time. I wish I could be the person I used to be. I wish I remembered what that felt like. If I could, I would go back and not change. I wouldn't let things get as bad as they are. And now I'm here in this position, not knowing what to do. Not knowing who to turn to. It feels horrible to put off or avoid questions from people about how my wedding planning is going. How do you explain to someone that you've put it off, because you don't know if it's going to happen? How do you tell yourself that? How do you tell yourself that it's okay when it's not? I don't want anyone to tell me it's going to be okay. I just want someone to listen. I just want someone to let me cry. I just want to stop crying. I just want to feel like everything is going to be okay. I just want everything to be okay.
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| if my internet keeps working... |
[14 Apr 2007|11:51pm] |
Comment and I'll--
1 - Tell you why I friended you. Assuming I can remember :)
2 - Associate you with something. A fandom, a song, a colour, a piece of fruit. SOMETHING.
3 - Tell you something I like about you.
4 - Tell you a memory I have of you.
5 - Associate you with a character/pairing.
6 - Ask something I've always wanted to know about you. (Or else I'll just ask a random question. I reserve that right.)
7 - Tell you my favorite user pic of yours.
8 - In return, you must spread this disease in your LJ.
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| puppy kisses |
[02 Nov 2006|04:03pm] |
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I know some of you have seen some pictures of harley, but i thought i'd post all of the ones we have so far so you can see just how cute he is.
( the best dog ever )
as you can tell, i'm bored.
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[09 Oct 2006|02:13pm] |
We went to Chi-town 2 weekends ago for the Inkin' Lincoln Tattoo Convention, and I'm finally getting time to post pics! Enjoy!
( You have no idea... )
This concludes our trip. Austin and I decided we would return to Chicago if money permits for our 2 year anniversary in February. Yay!
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[11 Sep 2006|04:03pm] |
Nothing really exciting. Just letting you all know I'm alive and things are great.
Austin said the cutest thing ever the other night. We were in Shepherd with Cousin David and I was getting 20 questioned. For some reason, David said, "There aren't enough Kihn's in the world" and Austin's reply was, "Don't worry we'll make some soon" or something to that effect...
I cannot wait to marry him and have his babies.
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[01 Aug 2006|07:25pm] |
Aaaaannnd our trip to Cedar Point this weekend...
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[01 Aug 2006|07:06pm] |
I know I'm way behind on the times, but here are some pics from Bob and Jen's wedding.
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[19 May 2006|02:08pm] |
So, for everyone that hasn't seen the house yet, or hasn't seen the almost-finished version, here are pictures of most of the house. There are a lot of pictures, so it will take a minute for them to load!
( Our sweet house! )
Thanks to everyone who helped with the moving and everything. We appreciate it more than you all know! I hope you enjoy the pictures, and I promise to update with more later!
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[11 May 2006|08:39pm] |
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I know I never update anymore and it's because I suck. But when I get all settled into the new house and Austin leaves his computer at home, I'll post tons of pictures and update for everyone to see!!!
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[05 Dec 2005|02:47pm] |
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I would just like to give a shout out and a big FUCK YEAH to whatever fucking cunt slashed all four of my tires and keyed the fuck out of my car on Saturday night. You're right, it totally looks better that way. Thanks a lot fucker. You bet your ass when I find out who you are (and I will, don't worry) you are going to pay for fucking with me.
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| stupid people love drama |
[21 Oct 2005|10:43pm] |
just a quick update.
i am cutting all ties. i get to call my hairdresser tomorrow and tell her that she's short one customer, and crystal's gonna start doing my hair.
i am also now making this friend's only (again) because stupid people can't keep their noses out of my business and i frankly can't trust anyone. if you want to be kept on my friends list comment, and i'll decide who i can trust.
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[17 Oct 2005|03:14pm] |
| My LiveJournal Trick-or-Treat Haul |
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| didge16 goes trick-or-treating, dressed up as A flapper. | | attemptfailure gives you 6 light green grape-flavoured nuggets. | | cmuhick gives you 16 light blue banana-flavoured pieces of bubblegum. | | dead_2_you gives you 15 light orange lemon-flavoured gummy worms. | | doggess tricks you! You get a 3.5-inch floppy disc. | | fenix409 gives you 7 teal licorice-flavoured pieces of bubblegum. | | girlhead gives you 5 light yellow spearmint-flavoured pieces of taffy. | | hardcoremylove tricks you! You get a dead frog. | | itsaidarrgh gives you 17 red apple-flavoured gummy bats. | | loungepants gives you 14 white orange-flavoured gummy bats. | | pulp_noir tricks you! You get a scratched CD. | | didge16 ends up with 80 pieces of candy, a 3.5-inch floppy disc, a dead frog, and a scratched CD. | | Another fun meme brought to you by rfreebern. |
i know, meaningless post...when i get more time to write something, i will.
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[22 Sep 2005|03:40pm] |
LJ Interests meme results
- beetles:
duh...my obsession with my car and all things vw bug - brown eyes:
ick. i'm deleting this interest right now. - cops suck:
i got a serving to minors ticket and the cops were just assholes to me and my friends so i hate them - hawthorne heights:
i like their music a lot, but i hate them because they re-released their first album. bastards - jager girls:
there were 4 of us girls (when i used to drink heavily) that, when we had the money, would buy fifths of jager and drink it like it was kool-aid. we loved the stuff, so we named ourselves the jager sluts, but i changed it to be more appropriate for el gay. - lip rings are hot:
duh. have you seen boys with lip rings? have you seen austin with lip rings? can you say, "cream in your pants?" it has nothing to do with the fact that i now currently have a lip ring, i wrote that before i did. so no, it's not because i think i'm super fucking hot. it's because when austin had his, i wanted to jump his bones constantly, and i think boys in general with body modifications are extremely attractive. - my chemical romance:
another band that i like a lot. - poison the well:
mmmm...nerdy...one of the most beautiful songs ever. - seestas:
my seestas! my real sister, kaytee, and my should-be-real sister, amanda rae. blood is thicker than water bitches, and sometimes family is in the heart. - starting line:
what's with all these fucking bands? their new cd? not as good as the first full length
Enter your LJ user name, and 10 interests will be selected from your interest list.
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| rant... |
[18 Sep 2005|05:26am] |
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mood |
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 bitchy |
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just recently becoming more and more pissed at a certain person (i won't name any names here) who is going to fucking die if i ever see her fucking face anywhere near me.
give it up. no one likes you.
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| My newest tattoo! |
[09 Sep 2005|01:26pm] |
 
i love david leos...
like what you see??
Desired Skin Tattoo and Body Piercing
132 S. Michigan Avenue
Big Rapids, MI 49307
231-796-3829
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| i can't even believe it |
[20 Aug 2005|01:42pm] |
i called my grandparents today to ask them if it was alright if austin and i came down for labor day. it seems like it's just fine, as long as he takes all of his piercings out and rips the skin from his body. god it makes me so mad that i have to answer 5 million questions about why he looks the way he looks. WHY THE FUCK DOES IT MATTER? i started crying and told my mom we weren't coming anymore, and then she got mad at me.
i understand that the way austin looks, hell, the way i look, is different for older people. they don't understand the aesthetic qualitites of the things we do to our bodies, they just see freaks. but i expected more from my own family. i wanted to bring austin there to meet them so they can meet the man i'm going to spend the rest of my life with. why can't they just follow their own advice that they taught me and not judge people by the way they look. if they would just take 5 minutes to talk to him they would see that he's the most amazing person they will ever meet.
i'm pissed.
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